YOUR RELATIONSHIP ON THE ROCKS…
Perhaps one of the biggest fears people have about doing marital therapy is that it is just another arena to play the game of “find the bad guy.” A lot of couples get to the point that they look for a marriage therapist because they have been stuck in an endless loop of criticism, defensiveness, ignoring each other or outright contempt.
We must have gotten married for some good reason… right?
Relationships are less like the calculated chess game we try to make them (“I do this so my spouse will give me affection”, or “I’m doing everything she asks me to do and she still isn’t happy,” or “This is how marriage works for everyone I know, why doesn’t my marriage work at all?”) and more like a dance where two people bring their emotions, hurts, hopes, and fears to the dance floor to swirl around with their partner’s emotions, hurts, hopes and fears.
When marriage works, it is beautiful and passionate and something you want to be a part of. When marriage stops working, you can feel stepped on, pushed around, and unappreciated.
The couples that we do our best work with are the couples who see divide and heartache in their relationship but still hope to work things out. They want to get their relationship dance flowing smoothly again.
Most couples don’t want to just throw in the towel on something they once felt so passionate about, but betrayal and addiction can really complicate things. Who starts a relationship thinking “one day the person I love will hurt me badly and then I will…”? Few people go into relationships expecting to be hurt the way they are sometimes.
Because the kind of wounds that addiction and betrayal bring are not things we plan for, most couples facing these issues don’t know how to move through the damage and build a strong relationship again.
Reading this page already gives you an advantage in the quest to see if you can save your relationship – you are recognizing that you don’t know what to do and that you need help. We know how to help.
…TO A ROCK SOLID RELATIONSHIP
Your first phase of marital therapy will be focused on helping to turn down some of the intense heat and the ongoing hurt. It’s a lot easier to see yourself and your partner when you don’t feel like you have to block their incoming swing.
The parts of the dance are just as important as the dance itself. We will work in marital sessions to not only learn how to relate to each other better, but to learn about each other more fully.
You will find a well trained, empathetic therapist who practices what they preach in their own relationships. We will go beyond the words, stories, and ideas that you and your partner are trying to exchange with little result – to helping you understand the inner workings of yourself and your relationship. We use clinically proven methods to start bridging the gap between you and your spouse and to get you on the path to a relationship you love being a part of.
Call now for a free 30-minute phone consultation with one of our therapists.